Certified Department of Canine Affirmation. Est. 2026. Every compliment verified, every rank climbing, sincerity never found lacking.
The Department of Canine Affirmation exists to formalize an instinct puppies have practiced unsupervised since the dawn of puppies: looking at a person like they personally invented kindness. We now log it, certify it, and deliver it on request.
Each compliment is selected using proprietary tail-wag telemetry, a representative sample of good vibes, and a reasonable amount of guessing, then assigned a Sincerity Rating. This figure has never, in Department history, read anything but 100%.
No compliment issued by this Department may be logged as insincere. Departmental charter reserves the Insincere field for a compliment not yet observed. This is described internally as generous.
Tapping again does not expedite your rank. It is, however, logged, filed, and quietly appreciated. The Department thanks you for your continued faith in this puppy's judgment of character.